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Joke of the Day

"Men and women CAN be just friends. But only if one of them is ugly."

"It's so cute how fish just can't contain their excitement when you cuddle them."

"why did the cookie go to the doctors? ... because he felt crumby!"

"So I heard the Summer Olympics are gonna be in Rio De Janeiro... What's next? The Olympics in Robert De Niro? ""I'm walkin' here!"""

"Attention, guys wearing ""skinny Jeans"", you took the phrase ""getting into her pants"" the wrong way"

"What do you do when you want to golf in a thunderstorm? Hold up a 1 Iron. Not even God can hit a 1 iron."

"What do you call a skinny misogynist? Skinny or fat, I find that they prefer to think of themselves as ""egalitarian""."

"What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? He wiped."

"My daughter wrote ""Daddy is the best"" in the snow then smashed it when I made her come inside. She'll make some lucky guy miserable one day."

"Some people say , well I'm glad I'm not as crazy as Jon . And I'm like glad I'm not as crazy as the people in the loony bin . The people in the loony Ben are like.... I'm glad I'm a squirrel."