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Joke of the Day

"Some people say , well I'm glad I'm not as crazy as Jon . And I'm like glad I'm not as crazy as the people in the loony bin . The people in the loony Ben are like.... I'm glad I'm a squirrel."

"Why did the turtle cross the road? ...to get to the Shell station."

"How is parsley and pubic hair alike? You just brush them off to the side and keep eating"

"I want a girl who asks me to do things that I have to Google."

"Drunk girls click ""reply all"" when they talk."

"What happens when you flip an 8 to it's side? Everything, given enough time"

"Walk into any flower shop and ask to see the chlamydias. That never gets old."

"How is a Buddhist monk and a bumblebee alike? They are both peaceful, but when pissed off have a tendency to burn."

"Show someone you hate them by buying them an Edible Arrangement."

"what is in common between h.clinton and ronda rousey? they both won the popular vote"