100744

Joke of the Day

"It's raining I'm pouring. Chick at the bar is whoring. We went to bed, she gave me head. Who says conventions are boring?"

"Today I learned that 48% of women in the U.S. are battered... and to think I've been eating mine plain for all these years."

"Is it okay to marry your second cousin? [xpost from /r/dadjokes] Sure, as long as you're legally divorced from the first one."

"America's Got (a very loose definition of what constitutes) Talent."

"""well that's a load on my back"" - relieved slut"

"15 out of 12 beers agree I can't do math when I'm drunk."

"What did the turkey eat for Christmas? Nothing, it was already stuffed!"

"Another sad news on an international celebrity... Justin Bieber was found alive in her condo earlier today."

"How do you get a Jewish girl's number? Roll up her sleeve."

"When is a pentagon not a pentagon? When it's intercepted by a separate plane."