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Joke of the Day

"(Dark humor) what's the difference between a sandwich and a dead baby? I don't fuck a sandwich before I eat it."

"What is six inches long and stiff in the morning? Crib death."

"Umm, no officer. I'm pretty sure that bag of weed fell out of YOUR pocket."

"The Art of Camouflage by Ruff Buttsex."

"One sweet thing about being the boss in the office is that you can actually order specific supplies you want to steal."

"No one got screwed worse than male ladybugs."

"Yo momma's so white... When she passes through a prism more prisms come out"

"What do a tomato and a gay quadriplegic have in common? They are both fruits that are kind of like vegetables."

"DiCaprio movie endings; Shutter Island: is he dead? Titanic: is the boat dead? Romeo & Juliet: is everyone dead? Inception: am I dead?"

"""shake what ya momma gave ya!"" *starts shaking low self-esteem*"