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Joke of the Day
"Remember how in Lord of the Rings they slept out under the stars? It was pretense."
Next Joke
"When does Sean Connery like to show up at Wimbeldon? Tennish."
"Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp."
"Sign in a store window during a blizzard ""Got frostbite? Fingerless gloves, half off!"""
"Do you love me because I am beautiful or I am I beautiful because you love me?"
"I still eat around bruised parts of fruit like a scared 4-year-old."
"I bought my girlfriend a treadmill and a Victoria's Secret catalogue."
"brought a knife onto a flight just so the security agents would tackle me because sometimes it's just nice to be held."
"I carry two crickets around in a small box so when I say something that isn't funny I can supply my own sound effects. They get real tired."
"Clown: Why are you wearing such a large shirt? Second Clown: I always perform in the big top."