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Joke of the Day

"What did the hippie say when somebody told him to get off of their couch? Namaste."

"There are 4 gay guys in a bar and only one bar stool, how do they all sit down? They turn the stool up side down"

"I loved Star Trek Into Darkness, but I have to admit the movie did have its pros and Khans"

"Where does a pencil sharpener keep its money? In a shavings account."

"*puts finger over your lips* Shhhhhhhhhhhhh *feeds you more applesauce making airplane noises*"

"I'm taking my kid to an aquarium today. (I'm putting my kid in the closet with Sponge Bob videos)"

"What do Iron man and Sarah Palin have in common? They both had a little Downey inside of them."

"Look picnics, if I wanted to spend three hours protecting my food with a spork, I'd just go to prison."

"The guy who stole my diary has died. My thoughts are with his family."

"Everyone should invest in silent comedy. After all, mime *is* money."