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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a mentally challenged feather pillow? A downs pillow."

"I used to steal identities... You people are so boring I ended up returning them."

"""The most comfortable place to put your elbows at dinner is on the table, so I'm gonna go ahead and make that bad manners."" -Some asshole"

"ME: *brings my mom to a knife fight* MOM: *shouting* use your words! MOM: *chasing knife fighters away with a broom* I know your mothers!"

"I farted in a room of hipsters I watched them fight each other over who heard it first."

"Did you guys hear the news? Apparently Donald Trump is a cuck."

"What is the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? ... I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face. Edit: Whoa, I knew this was a great joke but didnt expect this. Thanks!"

"The difference between Julius Caesar and a Rapist? Caesar came, saw, and conquered, a rapist saw, conquered and came."

"[AMA request] A person living in an electricity-free Amish community."

"My arm fell asleep, which is understandable, considering how boring the rest of my body has been."