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Joke of the Day
"Did you guys hear the news? Apparently Donald Trump is a cuck."
Next Joke
"Why did the Portuguese guy take Xanax? Hispanic attacks."
"Why did Rolf Harris leave Animal Hospital? He heard they were getting hares and lost interest!"
"My uncle started shouting at me about my ""misuse"" of emoticons and had a heart attack ;)"
"homework? decent grades? the bible said adam and eve not adam and achieve"
"I'll never be the girl who walks in the room and commands everyone's attenHEY! Can you at least finish reading this tweet?!"
"My girlfriend said, ""Fancy a bit of phone fun tonight?"" I said, ""Yeah, definitely. Let's call your mum and tell her you've died."""
"If you factor in ""supply and demand""... she DOES NOT want the D. There is so much D trying to go around, not even the alphabet wants the D."
"Some things you recycle, some you throw away. For example: Paper & plastic you recycle. Opportunities, love and your future you throw away."
"""Daddy, I-"" *presses button for soundproof backseat divider Wife: ""HOW MUCH DID-"" *presses button for soundproof passenger seat divider"