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Joke of the Day

"I just heard that someone at my gym drilled a hole in the wall of the girls locker room. Police are looking into it."

"What's the nastiest part about having sex with someone's grandma? Well, that DependsTM"

"Why did Jesus have a six pack? It was from all the cross-training..."

"Next time you're asked ""What's Up"" respond ""A delightful animated film about a young boy and an old man who fly away to an exotic place in a balloon house."""

"I just don't understand why Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell car insurance."

"Why shouldn't you give Muslim Women drugs? They'll get stoned. (Ba-dum tss)"

"What's the difference between a suicidal ghost hunter and a weaboo alcohol taster? One drinks bleach and watches spirits; the other drinks spirits and watches Bleach."

"Oatmeal shouldn't get to have the word ""meal"" in it. How about oatsnack? Or oatbullshit?"

"Why don't chickens wear underwear? Because their pecker is on their face."

"[Eating] Waiter: How's the meal? Me: I dunno. Let me check *pulls out phone Me: Not good. It only got 2 likes on Instagram Waiter: ..."