966
Joke of the Day
"What did the pirates say who stole Kim Kardashians jewelry? We wanted her booty!"
Next Joke
"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese"
"A man gets the words ""I love you"" tattooed to his penis... He then goes home to his wife and his wife tells him: ""honey, stop trying to put words in my mouth."""
"1. OMG will this ever end? 2. OMG will this ever end? 3. OMG will this ever end? -top 3 things on my mind when I'm in a a conversation"
"My wife saw an ad in a window Which said ""tampons 50cents"" Is that true, she asked the shopkeeper... Very true, he said....""no strings attached"""
"Seahawks on the Super Bowl Hey, so are you guys wanting to win the Super Bowl? Nah, we'll pass."
"Text is the perfect way of saying I have some information I need to give you but I in no way shape or form want to hear your voice"
"Next time you're in a hospital elevator, calmly ask a stranger if they know what floor you should get off at for infectious diseases."
"If someone tells you there are 2 Ayers Rock... Don't be fooled it's uluru's."
"Be sure you are standing on your left foot and only your left foot at midnight tonight... ...so that you start the new year off on the right foot!"