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Joke of the Day

"""Welcome to lazy club. My name i-*doors get kicked in* ""THIS IS A ROBBERY! NOBODY MOVE!"" [voice from the back] ""Nobody was going to."""

"I never finish anything. I have a black belt in partial arts."

"Trans-Jenner? Has that joke been made yet?"

"Worlds shortest horror story The last man on earth sat alone in a room...... there was a knock on the door..."

"Where does a river keep it's money? At the bank."

"What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator was opened? ""Close that damn door! Can't you see I'm dressing??"""

"If I had a dollar for every repost I've seen I'd be a millionaire"

"I promised my trainer that I'd set a gym schedule I would commit to regularly. So, now every time there's a lunar eclipse I work out."

"Why is the grass in Anfield Stadium so green? They are constantly putting millions of pounds of crap on it."

"What is the last thing you eat before you die? You bite the dust."