93772

Joke of the Day

"[on deathbed] ""Tell my Wif... *cough*"" Yes? Tell her what? ""Tell my Wifi provider their broadband speeds were moderate at best"" [dies]"

"[GOP debate] JOHN KASICH: my dad was a mailman so i understand our nation's struggles MODERATOR: what how JK: i went through everyone's mail"

"Why would anyone want to remove their laser hair?"

"My friend keeps saying ""cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water"" I know he means well..."

"What do the chronically late have in common with sex traffickers? They both ""run behind""."

"What is the worst place to have the ""you break it, you buy it"" rule? The pet store"

"Bank of America is halting foreclosures in all 50 states as part of an investigation into why 7 people in the U.S. still have homes."

"When I die I want to pass like my grandfather did, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming like the other people in his car."

"The average monkey swallows 7 spider-monkeys every single night."

"What do you call a midget Mexican? A little Juan."