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Joke of the Day

"Finding a good date is like looking for a parking spot... all the good ones are taking and the rest are handicapped."

"I was informed last week that ""cheat day"" does not mean what I thought it did. In related news: Baby, sit down. I have to tell you somethin"

"Sour cream is Mexican ketchup. I put that shit on everything."

"Bought a bag of Sweetheart candies & cracked my tooth on one.When I spit it out & looked at it,itsaid ""Next time call when you say you will"""

"What did the bear do to be labeled a hipster? He hibernated in the summer."

"""He's a jerk. I'm over him anyway. (5 minutes later) Ooh, he texted! I want to have his babies!"" -Women"

"What's brown and rhymes with 'snoop'? Dr. Dre"

"What do you call a group of unorganized cats? A CAT-ASTROPHE!"

"What's the difference between my bike and your mom? Your dad doesn't watch when I ride my bike."

"(bed bath and beyond) *walks to beds* Wow nice beds *walks to baths* Wow nice baths *walks through intergalactic wormhole* Wow nice beyond"