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Joke of the Day
"""I just died in your arms"" sounds much more romantic than ""You're holding a dead body."""
Next Joke
"What is the closest thing similar to a woman having a period? Your salary. It also comes once a month, and lasts about 5 days. And if it doesn't come, it means you are in big trouble."
"Sometimes I wonder if the entire world is full of defensive, conceited douchebags who can't laugh at themselves... Then I read some Reddit comments and I'm almost certain of it."
"My internet bride got delivered today, she's the WiFi always dreamed of."
"The internet is the devil sitting on the right shoulder of a man who suffers from insomnia, whispering in his ear ""you will never sleep""."
"When I get lost in Reddit, I instinctively click on ""Front"", and then regret it. I regReddit."
"I like my coffee like I like my women... Black and made by my dad."
"What do you say to a crazy person who's talking to themselves? Hey, the person you're talking to said to give me a few bucks."
"My wife was fixing the caulk around our tub... Me: You should use some caulk softener to make that easier. Wife: Is that like a picture of your mom or something? (actual conversation)"
"Your password doesn't remember you either. He moved on. He's someone else's password now."