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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the Pigeon rebellion? Yeah, it was a ""coo"" d'etat."

"What do you call a spitting vampire? Spatula."

"Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?"

"I'm writing a book about how people can free themselves from taking pictures of themselves. It's a selfie-help book."

"Ha, I told my brother that carbon had seven protons and he believed me. He was mean to me when we were kids."

"Hey single ladies, you want a boyfriend? Easy! Learn to shut the fuck up and dramatically lower your standards!"

"Why do dentists not watch an entire porn video? They only watch the oral parts."

"The worlds worst joke... EDIT: Thanks for the gold!"

"I was diagnosed with Alzheimer's seven years ago But it feels like it was just yesterday"

"Should have been called ""Star Wars: The Missing Force Kin"" Because it's all about looking for her Jedi brother."