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Joke of the Day
"I'm opening a Canadian-Russian fusion restaurant... It's called Vladimir Poutine."
Next Joke
"Did you hear the latest about Donald Sterling? He wouldn't get in his limo. He said that it was ""too black."""
"[job interview] Says here you're good with nicknames? ""I don't wanna brag Super Cool Interviewer Man"" *under his breath* holy shit he's good"
"What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A Hot Cross bunny."
"What would you name a star wars movie featuring Pluto? This is really just a bad pun, but to me those are the best kind of jokes Pluto strikes from the back and destroys Uranus."
"What is Green and Oblong? A well disguised orange!"
"Just because I'm smiling doesn't necessarily mean that I like you. I might be picturing you on fire."
"In honor of Pi Day: Who founded the round table? Sir Cumference"
"There should be bongs and blunts at viewings in funeral homes... A true wake and bake."
"For $11, you can come to my house and watch me shave. The plot is a little weak, but the 3D effects are amazing."