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Joke of the Day

"I saw my friend's girl sleeping with another man in the army but didn't tell him... It was a private affair."

"It's not funny when a First Lady runs for President. It's Hillary-ous."

"It's rude when people ask me what I did all day like growing my hair isn't enough."

"A dialogue between Russians. -Guys, maybe we should stop drinking. -We allready did. We're getting wasted now!"

"I called the fortune-teller for an appointment. She said ""We will meet at 2pm"" ... I didn't go"

"everytime pitbull performs i get scared because i probably know the words from drunken bar nights"

"What did Obama say when he called the Russian Parliament? ""Are you Putin me on?"""

"Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Because he's a fucking creep"

"God, grant me the serenity to yell at immigrant children, the courage to still say I'm a Christian, and the ignorance to not get the irony."

"What's the difference between a police baton and a magic wand? Ones used for cunning stunts."