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Joke of the Day

"(Me,after returning from exam) Mom: (Greeting) How was your paper? Me: I wrote what I knew, I copied what I didn't knew."

"Why do accountants make the best serial killers? Because they're calculating."

"[sign outside butcher shop: POLISH SAUSAGES - ASK US] ME: Yes, I'm here about the sausage polishing job?"

"What kind of drugs to frogs take? methamphibians."

"Mom: If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you do it too? Me:If all parents used that same metaphor would you use it too? #slapped"

"I don't need a hot tub, I prefer for a mildly attractive tub with a great sense of humor and a good job."

"Why did the bike fall over? It was ""two"" tired."

"boys love mysterious girls so don't be afraid to show up to dates with a shovel and a smear of fresh blood on your collar"

"A doctor, a lawyer, a priest, a rabbi, and a nun all walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says ""What is this? A Joke?"""

"Q: What did the tailor say when he pricked his finger? A: Darn!"