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Joke of the Day

"[NSFW]We should learn three things from dogs. 1. Love 2. Trust 3. Faithfulness And what we actually learn? Doggy style"

"A woman asked her husband for a divorce after he said they needed to go get new counter tops. She knew he was taking her for granite."

"Im sorry I yelled ""GARY LIKED STAR WARS EPISODE ONE"" when the pastor asked if anyone knew of a reason why you and Gary shouldn't be married"

"Psychiatrist: ""Your check bounced and was returned for insufficient funds."" Me: ""So how does that make you feel?"""

"What do you call a cow that's just had a baby? De-calfinated!"

"I doubt vodka has all the answers But it's worth a shot."

"Donald trump wins presidency"

"What did one statue say to the other statue he hadn't seen in a while? ""Statue bro?"""

"What did the black eyed peas say when they left the dentist? ""I got a filling, woo-hoo!"""

"I was so happy when I got my new thesaurus in the mail. But when I opened it, every page was blank! Damn. I have no words to describe how upset I am."