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Joke of the Day
"What does a suicidal man say to a suicidal girl? Hey, wanna hang?"
Next Joke
"Why did the pancake cross the road? His friends egged him on"
"if u disregard the teeth, shark attacks are actually kinda cute"
"man I hate tailgaters I was doing 35 over the limit today and the idiot behind me was still tailgating and the flashing lights on his car looked stupid too"
"Do you know why the Little Mermaid wore seashells? Because she was too small for D shells."
"Wife: ""Ian is coming over."" Me: ""Ian from work or Ian who is good at disguises?"" Wife: ""Ian- *pulls off mask* -who is good at disguises!"""
"Whats the best place to drive to in Iowa? The Middle. That way, you're always driving out of Iowa."
"Your momma is so fat... But I still fucked her."
"Saw some Mennonites playing Baseball yesterday All I saw was a swing and Amish"
"I could have sworn I saw spearmint flavored fig newtons at the shop the other day. But it turns out they were just a fig-mint of my imagination."