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Joke of the Day

"It was mealtime on an airplane... ...and the flight attendant asked a passenger if he would like some dinner. ""What are my choices?"" he asked. ""Yes or no,"" she replied."

"90's kids won't get this... Social Security benefits."

"NASA's Scott Kelly is back on Earth after spending a year in space He found out how many states Trump won and left again"

"Giving people the finger while driving just isn't effective. Which is why I had the catapult installed."

"How do you help someone with ADD or ADHD? Send them to a concentration camp!"

"What do a homeless woman and an American football player have in common? They both take their pads off after four periods"

"Life is like toilet paper, you're either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole."

"What do you call a cow that gives no milk? An udder failure."

"*gets down on one knee* Wow, you really suck. Why can't you be more like the other knee?"

"What did the penis say to the asshole in the morning? This bowl ain't big enough for the both of us."