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Joke of the Day

"You're breaking up with me because I ""don't put food in the correct things?"" WTF? After I've JUST made you a delicious bowl of toast??"

"I'm writing a theatrical work on puns It's a play on words."

"The new mouthwash I bought says ""24 HOUR PROTECTION ....use twice daily"""

"What happens when a cow stops shaving? It grows a Moostache."

"I've counted 8 people so far whose New Years resolutions include ""loose weight"". Can I add spelling to your list too?"

"Females on Facebook suffer in silence louder than anyone I've ever met in my life."

"I think Jurassic Park should have been entitled ""Fuck Religion"" Hahah."

"What's the cheapest kind of meat? Deer balls, they're under a buck!"

"When people say ""Let's not get off on the wrong foot here"", I reply ""Please don't get off on either of my feet""."

"When I worked at the shoe store... I was the sole employee."