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Joke of the Day

"I love Halloween... It's the only time of the year that I can lure young children in with candy without using my van."

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"What's the difference between lobsters and crabs? I don't *have* lobsters!"
"Drunk Guy Guy: Dude I Wasn't That Drunk, Friend:Dude U Were WAtching TV And Laugh, Guy: Sooo -_-, Friend : The TV Wasn't On"
"Where did the sick boat go to get a checkup? The Dock!"
"Why is a viola solo like a bomb? By the time you hear it, it's too late to do anything about it. A long list of viola jokes: http://www.mit.edu/~jcb/jokes/viola.html"
"What do Mediterranean volcanoes make for dessert? bakLAVA"
"I'll be signing copies of my tweets this Friday at Barnes & Noble in Salt Lake City! Just meet me by the bathrooms at 5:30 & bring a pen."
"How many SEO experts does it take to change a lightbulb? lightbulbs buy light bulbs neon lights sex porn"
"If a blue man lives in the blue house, a red man lives in the red house, and a green man lives in the green house, who lives in the white house? an orange man"
"Whats the smartest thing to come out of a womans mouth? Albert Einsteins cock"
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