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Joke of the Day

"People belittle the internet ""talking about a dress"" as if we're busy solving problems otherwise."

"I'm starving. I haven't eaten all year."

"Truthfully officer, I wouldn't have pulled over, if I known all you were gonna do is complain about my driving.."

"With the amount of people who hide their identity online you'd think this place is rampant with superheroes."

"What's the difference between Voldemort and Tyrion Lannister? One had a horcrux, the other had a whorecrush.."

"""It's a boy!"" ...he screamed, ""it's a boy!"". Tears rolling down his face, and he vowed to never go back to Thailand."

"How many men escaped the destruction of Sodom? A Lot."

"People that can't walk are so lame"

"I like my jokes they way I like my robots. Killer."

"Woman cut me off, stole my parking spot. I honked, flipped her off and went into yoga. Woman came into class as the instructor. Namaste."