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Joke of the Day

"Now that I think about it, I probably didn't need glasses for my butt. I guess hindsight is 20/20"

"What was the last thing that Columbus said to his sailors before getting on the ship? ""Okay men, get on the ship."""

"Remember when you were a kid and used to blow Bubbles? Well, Bubbles is back in town and he's looking for your number."

"Really Speedo Guy? Things aren't bad enough in the world already? You've got to display to the whole beach that you're hung like a Tic-Tac?"

"Elephants and a Guy Two Elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: ""I really don't get how he can feed himself with that thing!"

"I don't drink about you anymore."

"What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wiped."

"All I'm saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old?"

"Only the immature will laugh A sausage and an egg are frying in a pan. ""It's a bit too hot in here for me, mate."" The sausage says to the egg. The egg screams, ""Ahh! A talking sausage!"""

"Guys, I know we're 3 days from Inauguration Day... But here's how Bernie Sanders can still win!"