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Joke of the Day

"Humor: the only thing I like dry."

"Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate his pizza before it was cool"

"Why is Oklahoma so windy? Because Kansas sucks, and Texas blows"

"How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Apparently not five, my basement is still dark. (taken from this page: https://www.facebook.com/ImammahdidailyIII?fref=ts)"

"Why do Chemists have so much debt? Because they have so much Antimony!"

"Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible? A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet."

"Every morning, I get out of bed and run around the block 5 times. Then I slide the block back under the bed and go back to sleep."

"How do you get a horse out of jail? Hay bail."

"What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow? You can't milk a cow for 14 years."

"I promise to remain the same grounded, gracious, friend I've always been after winning $7 from Powerball #dreams"