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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend is a pornstar Shes gunna kill me when she finds out."
Next Joke
"3-year-old: *stares at the baby* What does it do? Me: Nothing yet. She's not here to entertain you. 3: Me: 3: Can we get one that is?"
"So the local Spandex store just closed The local spandex store closed down... ... I guess they couldn't expand"
"What do you call a movie set during a woman's menstral cycle? A period piece"
"Cashier: Bag or plastic sir Me: Neither (scoops up forty items under my shirt and walks out)"
"What do you call four Mexicans that have drowned? Cuatro Cinco."
"Why is Mike Pence magic? He can turn fruits to vegetables"
"[God wakes up] oh man i am hungover, what'd i do last night? [sees that goats have the ability to scream now] haha oh yea"
"I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch."
"Too many girls want attention, not enough want respect!"