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Joke of the Day

"They say that it's tough to learn Bosnian because it has seven verb tenses: six past one present and no future."

"Q. What's the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist? A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you."

"What would you call an indian dating site? connect the dots"

"This mop seemed a lot more exciting on the infomercial."

"Don't cry over spilled milk. And broken eggs. And a violated ham. And-FINE, I'LL LEAVE. This isn't the only grocery store in town, you know."

"Why can't Emma Watson ever play Hermione Granger again? 'Cos once you go black, you never go back."

"Why couldn't the t-rex clap? Because he's dead."

"Fucking dick shit condoms"

"[to snake at news station] you can't do weather anymore ""ssswhy not?"" are we getting rain tomorrow? ""sssno"" do you see how that's confusing?"

"Do girls that make duck faces in pictures walk in a V formation at the mall?"