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Joke of the Day

"Q. What's the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist? A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you."

"Did you hear about the pirate who used to walk the plank every night? Well, he couldn't afford a dog."

"Living in Russia... Living in Russia in the winter, you're already snowden."

"Don't forget to check your backseat for murderers! Haha! No, but seriously bring me a coke it's hot in here."

"This bottle of OxyClean says ""GREAT ON WINE AND TOMATO SAUCE"". Call me crazy, but I think they're trying to poison Italians?"

"My dad wore my mom's clothes and vice-versa. Really didn't want to see them like that. To me, they were trans-parent"

"Q: What is Iraq's national bird? A: Duck."

"How are Roman Polanski and pimples similar? Both cum on your face when you're 13. How are Roman Polanski and body hair similar? Both cum on your ass when you're 13."

"Say one positive thing about your opponent Well...he does convert oxygen into carbon dioxide which helps trees grow."

"After my friend passed away I got his sibling a parrot to soften the blow. I also taught it to say, ""Dave, it's your brother. Reincarnation is real!"""