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Joke of the Day
"Two guys walk into a bar.... You would think the first guy would've warned the other."
Next Joke
"For all of us singles out there... Happy Ballantine's day!!"
"What does a ghost cow say? *wave arms around* MoooooOOOOOOoooooooo"
"My wife has packed her things and left me... My wife has packed her things and left me due to my obsession with glass objects. Frankly, I'm shattered."
"A thousand millibar go into a bar... ..."
"So a guy walks into a bar... And yells, ""I HAVE EBOLA!"""
"What's the worst thing your wife can text you after she sends you nudes? ""Oops, wrong person."""
"How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh? Tentacles."
"Shout out to my arms for always being by my side... & my legs for being there every step of the way"
"The first Hobbit movie was half the book. The second, about a quarter. In the sixth instalment, the group has a 3 hour breakfast and a nap."