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Joke of the Day

"Hey, boy. Are you a Swiss army knife? Because you're a smaller, less effective version of everything I need."

"They say attractiveness is relative... my cousin seemed to disagree"

"What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody Nose"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! A Fred ! A Fred who ? Who's a Fred of the Big Bad Wolf ?"

"I'm coming out of the closet. Not that! I mean her husband finally left for work."

"Mr. Salad asks Ms. Soup to go on a date. Ms. Soup accepts. ""What should I wear?"" Mr. Salad asks. She replies, ""It doesn't matter to me, just be well dressed."""

"There once was a man from Peru Whose limerick was three lines too few."

"I'm never satisfied with my haircuts at first... ...but then they grow on me."

"What do you call a snail on a sail boat? A snailor"

"What is the size of women in Italy? Itali-cized."