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Joke of the Day

"I knew I was destined to be a psychologist not a magician... ...when I pulled a habit out of a rat."

"Ladies, the word for the day is ""legs."" Spread the word."

"What happens when you give a cow a joint? The steaks are high"

"Happy Thursday guys and remember. If you can't spot the douche at work today, then it's probably you."

"Tragic: In the world every 60 seconds... ...One minute passes."

"The Energizer bunny as been arrested! He was charged with battery. EDIT: ""H"" key on my damn keyborad."

"How do you circumcise a Texan? Kick his sister in the jaw."

"Dead Babies I hate it when I'm driving out of my garage and my next door neighbour's son stands on my way and I run over him by accident and I have to bury him in my backyard. #FuckGrammar"

"Did you hear that the BBC have sacked Bob the Builder? They feel they can no longer trust a children's TV star who claims to be able to 'fix it'"

"My relationship status: Waiting for a miracle."