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Joke of the Day

"What idiot called it ""the clap"" and not ""dishonorable discharge?"""

"I've just been charged with stocking a chicken. I'm hoping to get it reduced."

"How to pick up women: 1-approach beautiful lady 2-bend at the knees 3-lift gently 4-oh god she's screaming 5-put her down the cops are here"

"Mythology gags, anyone? What can kill you with a glance and goes ""Hittthhh""? The Basilisp."

"What did the monkey say when he was on a winning streak? I've banana roll lately."

"Until you've tried to start a conga line at a funeral, don't tell me about your drinking problem."

"I shot a turkey for the first time today... Scared the shit out of everyone in the frozen foods section."

"Why do seagulls live by the sea? If they lived by the bay they'd be bagels."

"I went into a haunted house today. All the ghosts ejaculated on my face. It was a bookkake."

"If you jumped off a bridge in Paris You'd be In seine"