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Joke of the Day

"Therapist: resentment is like drinking poison in the vain hope it makes your enemies sick Me: not if I'm banking on them eating my body"

"Why was the criminal's argumentative essay so good? He had some outstanding warrants."

"In life, we should all aim to be like Italian meatballs. Well seasoned and well rounded."

"Today is International Women's Day. It was actually supposed to be held 2 days ago but they took too long to get ready."

"you're mama so fat... she broke her leg and gravy poured out."

"What's the hardest thing about skateboarding? Telling your parents you're gay."

"I just saw Avatar and I've got one thing to say: Blue Man Group ROCKED!"

"All the toilets in New York's police stations have mysteriously vanished. Now the police have nothing to go on."

"Well it's taken 10 years, but I've just finished my first book.... I think I will start reading another tomorrow.."

"So i stole this joke from I Love Lucy, So a woman walks into a restaurant The woman says to the waiter, ""Two pork chops, and make them lean."" And the waiter says, ""Yes, ma'am. Which way?"""