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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a feline massage therapist? A cat scratcher."
Next Joke
"I've been getting bullied... and I've been thinking about suicide. I would simply just drink BULLEACH."
"My grandmother tried keeping her hysterectomy a secret... ...but the doctors let the cat out of the bag."
"Why couldn't Moses believe his mother sent him away in a basket? Because he was in de-nile"
"where did Marry go after the explosion? everywhere"
"How did the jury find the hamburger? Grill-ty as charred!"
"Loads of people are lining up to buy my vampire teeth. Fang queue."
"*horse walks into a bar* *horse walks into a bar* *horse walks into a bar* *horse walks into an optometrist* Horse: Holy shit please help me"
"Like prison, most don't learn the life of crime till locked up. Like twitter, I learned to creep into houses and quietly eat their cheese."
"I became a vegetarian 4 months ago.. .. I guess you can say that I quit cold turkey"