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Joke of the Day

"My grandmother tried keeping her hysterectomy a secret... ...but the doctors let the cat out of the bag."

"I can tell people are judgmental just by looking at them."

"Just like Hitler with the tiny mustache, Kim Jong-Un is ruining that haircut for everyone else."

"How can you tell if a road is sad? It has low shoulders."

"I really don't understand why people tell 9/11 jokes. What happened on the ninth of November?"

"In a recent survey 9 out of 10 bros actually chose Ho's over each other."

"Why did the restaurant on the moon fail? They barely had any atmosphere."

"It's especially on Fridays at 5 pm when I wish I could slide down the back of a brontosaurus directly into my car."

"I'm not that smart... and have no clue as to what any word means when it has more then two syllables. How will I ever shave?"

"I wear a 3-piece suit to bed in case someone breaks in & we have nothing to talk about. ""Did you notice I'm wearing a suit?"" ""Yes"""