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Joke of the Day

"You can lead a horse to water You can leave your horse behind. Cuz your horse don't dance n if he don't dance then he ain't no horse of mine"

"""Good morning please could I have one human ticket to the water park"" Sir are you a shark in disguise? *sharks fake eyebrows slide off*"

"What do you call 24 carrots? Edible gold."

"Who knows how to sing Mariah Carey songs? Not Mariah Carey"

"A man's wife died and he called wife's parents many times after some time Mother in Law: Stop calling. How many times we need to tell you that she died? Man: It pleases me to listen that she died."

"Did you hear the one about the guy who got two tickets to the Cuckold Convention? His wife ended up taking someone else."

"Can you smell mothballs? I can't. I can never get their legs far enough apart."

"I'm emotionally constipated. I haven't given a shit in days"

"A tourist walked into a fish and chip shop in Ireland. ""I'll have fish and chips twice"" he orders. ""Sure I heard you the first time"" came the reply."

"I like my sentences like I like my women: awkward but with good colon usage and regular periods."