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Joke of the Day

"""Good morning please could I have one human ticket to the water park"" Sir are you a shark in disguise? *sharks fake eyebrows slide off*"

"If you leave without a reason, don't bother coming back with an excuse."

"Why did the fisherman keep taking off? Because he was fly fishing."

"Why is an angry drunk not called mean-spirited?"

"Sometimes I hide my wife's inhaler.... The neighbours think I am a stud when they hear her panting heavily ""give it to me!"""

"What is a Jedi's favorite salad dressing? Skywalker Ranch."

"Emmanuel Lubezki walks into a bar and orders one shot."

"Jennifer Aniston's dance scenes as a stripper in ""We're The Miller's"" are totally Oscar worthy. Oscar is my nickname for my penis."

"What do you call a pair of crows? An attempted murder."

"What's the difference between a prostitute's vagina and r/Jokes? The vagina gets new, *original* content injected into it regularly."