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Joke of the Day
"I like my sentences like I like my women: awkward but with good colon usage and regular periods."
Next Joke
"Almost got raped in prison My family takes Monopoly way too seriously"
"How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up like a choir boy"
"eer booze and fun!' 'A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender asks the seal ""What's your pleasure?"" The seal replies ""Anything but Canadian Club."""
"Yesterday I accidentaly came on my girlfriends earring... Now she has hearing-aids!"
"If God is your co-pilot - swap seats."
"Dear public restrooms: A toilet paper dispenser should turn loosely. Nobody wants to wipe their ass with a handful of confetti."
"I was suspicious that big multinational chemical corporation was up to no good, but then I saw that green cartoon leaf in its logo. Whew!"
"First in my neighborhood to cut the grass and now the other husbands are looking at me like I reminded the teacher to assign homework."
"Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light? A: The color."