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Joke of the Day
"Where do you find a dog with no arms and no legs? Right where you left it."
Next Joke
 
"What does a caterpillar do on New Years Day ? Turns over a new leaf !"
"The worst part of eating vegetables getting them out the wheelchair"
"People who eat ass have a shitty taste in sex"
"Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Listening to an antijoke."
"So Donald Trump is running for President..."
"""Can I pet your dog?"" ""Sure, but he can be aggressive."" [He pushes a pamphlet about the dangers of gluten towards me with his nose]"
"If you can read but still watch the Kardashians please donate your unused literacy to someone who might use it."
"The wifi going down on me is the most action I'm going to get tonight."
"I never argue, I just explain why I'm right."