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Joke of the Day
"What's worse than morning wood? Mourning wood"
Next Joke
"I sat down beside this guy in a diner, every time he went to take a bite of his sandwich I'd say nomnomnom. He left. Making friends is hard."
"Whats the difference between Gabrielle Giffords and her husband....... Her husband flies in a bullet whereas bullets fly in to her.... too soon?"
"I used to be a plumber on the International Space Station Shit was outta this world."
"How does Stephen Hawking refresh after a long day? F5"
"My wife just walked into a huge spider web. She is now a black belt in karate."
"I went to the doctor today and he told me to stop masturbating so much. ""Why?"" I asked. ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""
"What did the Giant say after he ate Tonga? 'I want Samoa!'"
"Be the first thought on her mind when she wakes up & the last before she sleeps... unless she's plotting your murder... then don't be that."
"I slept on my neck funny and today I will be turning my whole body like Batman every time I have to look at something."