76574

Joke of the Day

"When a cop tells you to ""spread 'em"" he is not flirting. I know this now."

"I have to find a new personal trainer. He didn't do squat(s)."

"America thought about using fat as a currency... ...but there was too much inflation."

"There are three kinds of people in the world... The ones that know how to count and the ones that dont"

"How did Harry Potter get down the hill? Walking. jk, rolling."

"I have stopped debating with master since the day ... ... I subscribed /r/nofap. Got to keep up with the community."

"I dumped my blind fiance yesterday. She never saw it coming."

"I wish dogs had facial expressions because when he's obviously checking out my junk, I'd kind of like to know his opinion."

"Why do people have sex when they go camping? Because it's fucking in tents!"

"Surprise sex is the best sex. Unless you're in prison."