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Joke of the Day

"I once ate a watch It was time consuming, I didn't go back for seconds."

"What's the difference between Jewish people and Harry Potter? Harry can survive the Chamber."

"I dropped my bowl of SpaghettiOs and it spelled 'oooooooo' on the floor. Spooky"

"I'm way more unique than everyone else who likes the same esoteric bullshit as me."

"There's a new dating site for bestiality enthusiasts It's called Petfinder.com"

"What is Moby Dicks dad's name? Poppa Boner"

"I love my kids but sometimes I wish the school bus would pick them up at 4:30 p.m. on Sunday."

"My biggest complaint about Batman v Superman is how the movie always just assumes you know which one is which."

"Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because it had nobody to go with."

"Divide and conquer? Ok. *opens calculator app*"