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Joke of the Day
"Women like men with an accent, not an Axe scent"
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"What's the difference between today's most sophisticated encryption that can still be cracked and the still uncracked ciphers of the Zodiac Killer? Ted Cruz"
"There's a new magazine for gay military members.It's mainly just photos of Privates."
"If I were to remove my intestines and lay them out, they'd reach all the way to my ex-wife's house. SEE, DEBORAH? I'M A MESS WITHOUT YOU!"
"I missed my cake day yesterday. Here's a joke. My life."
"How many niggers does it take to win a war? All of them."
"How to kill time. Hold your right ear with your lett hand and your nose with your right hand, then hold your left ear with your right hand and your nose with your left hand, and repeat and repeat."
"Last 4th I remember watching the fireworks on the TV In hindsight, that probably wasn't the best place to light them"
"my uber driver said today, ""I love my job, I'm my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do..."" Then I said, ""Turn left"""
"I should have seen this breakup coming.... The nicest thing she ever said to me was, ""Oh wow, that car almost hit you."""