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Joke of the Day

"I know this is a long shot, but any super-attractive men and women out there also self-confessed ""nerds?"""

"I've learnt a lot from the movies over the years, such as how to count using Roman numerals... I, II, III, IV, V, Balboa."

"Now I'm not saying I'm a good businessman... But I spent $534 million less than Hillary Clinton to not become president."

"Q: When is a pig not quite a pig? A: When it's oink-ognito."

"I used to always ask my mom for things & she'd say ""what's the magic word"" and I'd say ""abracadabra"" and she'd say ""you're why dad left."""

"What happened to the gay dude whose lover kicked him out his house? He is Homoless"

"I need constant reassurance, right?"

"Q: What's as sharp as a vampire's fang? A: His other fang."

"At what age is it acceptable to tell a highway it's adopted?"

"What do bulls do math with? A cow-culator! (Cue groans)"