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Joke of the Day

"I've learnt a lot from the movies over the years, such as how to count using Roman numerals... I, II, III, IV, V, Balboa."

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"God talked to Jews like 500 times in the Old Testament, and not one warning about the Nazis."
"Since everyone is writing a poem, please don't read mine [deleted]"
"Germany 7 - 1 Brazil"
"Why didn't they just call ""Ant-Man"" Uncle? Credit to Steve Higgins from The Tonight Show."
"(Mild GoT spoilers) Why is Hodor's real name Wylis? Because everyone wonders what he's talkin' bout."
"So Mrs Lincoln... Besides that, how'd you like the play?"
"The pen is mightier than the sword. Also, parking a car in someone's living room sends a pretty damn clear message too."
"Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with."
"Men are like department stores. Their clothes should always be half off."
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