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Joke of the Day

"Mimosa's The morning after pill for an alcoholic's hangover."

"The Mother Of All storms (Frankenstorm) is heading toward New York City... Trump better get out the hairspray."

"According to really smart people I should have started saving 20 years ago."

"I want an ocean of orange soda It's a Fanta sea of mine"

"So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley She said ""Tenpin?"" I said, ""No, it's a permanent job."" - Tim Vine, King of the one liners."

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? AYEE ya thought it be ARRR but it be the 'C'!"

"My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met."

"Is it cocky to have more than one penis? I think it's two cocky."

"Twitter is like a very demented game of The Sims. Everyday I check to see how my people are doing and make sure they're still alive."

"What do you call an animal rights' activist that never grows old? PETA Pan"