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Joke of the Day

"Logic What happens when u ask a fake logic fan... What is your favorite logic album? Their response Flexicution"

"Why American Names Are Like ""Jackson, Wilson, Markson..... Robinson, Kenson, Anderson, Davidson, Jemson, Johnson"" Because This Is The Easy Way For Mom To Remember Who Is Whose Son."

"What is the difference between an apple and an orange? None, the two are not a snake"

"Kevin fills a beaker of water and places it on the machine... ""One liter of water."" it read. Kevin gasped and sat back in his chair ""This speaks volumes..."""

"My wife and I are painting our house. I never knew there were so many greys. I hear there's a book about it. There's at least 50."

"The best curve on a girl is her smile. Lol just kidding, look at dat ass."

"Who's the coolest guy at the hospital? The ultra sound guy. Who's the coolest guy when he's not around? The hip replacement guy."

"How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? *Nein*"

"[first date] I'm really nervous about this. It's been a long time since I've [holds fork up and squints] used silverware."

"*wife wonders where I am* *hears every musical snowman in the store start singing* *knows where I am*"