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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between my computer and Paul Walker... ... When my computer crashes, I give a shit."

"What is the most important factor in China's future? Euthanasia."

"What do you call an aggresive white guy that over-acts in a movie? A salty cracker with cheese."

"I justified buying a PS3 because I knew I could always use it to just watch movies, and now that's the only reason I still have it. A 250GB hard drive holds a shitload of internet porn"

"Well, you know what they say about nice guys... ..they always let girls come first."

"I decided to put some ketchup in my eyes... ...but in Heinzsight, it wasn't a good idea."

"How do mountainers send messages? By ski-mail."

"ME: Excuse me...Where's the rowing boat equipment? EMPLOYEE: Keep going down there, Oar Aisle. ME: EMPLOYEE: ME: EMPLOYEE: ME: Or you'll what?"

"Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickle? Because it had more cents"

"Did you hear about the Chinese Chef who broke out of jail? Apparently he went out for a wok and never came back."