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Joke of the Day

"When I see JUST MARRIED I like to think it means 'only married' like there are higher types of commitment but they just settled for marriage"

"I tried to come out of the closet by singing. It was my swan song"

"Why didn't the TSA let the chair through security? It was armed."

"You can't go by good looks as not everything is as it seems. Remember The Trojan Horse, Snow White's apple and your ex."

"Ugly How do you know your the ugly in a couple? I will spell it out for you, U come first..."

"Mom: I think I'll name her Jenny. Dr: I'm sorry, that name is already taken, but you can name her jenny_2828"

"There was once a psych researcher with a rare genetic defect that gave her four buttocks. She was fired for being bi-assed."

"What's the difference between a Greyhound Station and a crab with big boobs? One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean."

"*tries to mount a horse* Horse: ""I have a boyfriend."""

"My mum said that if I don't get off reddit and do my homework she'll slam my head on the keyboard, but I think she's jokinfjreoiwjrtwe4to8rkljreun8f4ny84c8y4t58lym4wthylmhawt4mylt4amlathnatyn"